Over the years... a few

Changes that I happened to see in myself. Good or Bad .. I'm not sure. but just thought penning them down would make quite an interesting (at least for me) read! ;)
so here.. the mutation process that I underwent, say before and after teens, rather some of those that I remember..

i was so restraint opening up in the public. say stage fear or whatsoever. its like i go up on the stage, for some competition and i remember the whole world went dark and blurred
- i grew up to be totally opposite. I opened up so much. there is no fear in me anymore!

i used to get so irritated with those school teachers of mine who were biased towards particular students
- with time I started taking it light. it just adds up to my tensions and nothing else.

competition was such a hard thing for me. like every other parents, my parents wanted me to top the class since KG (except for a fewer times, I could satisfy them all through) and the day when the progress report shows non-1st rank was the most cruel day that I can ever go through in life. its like there was a girl who used to fight for 1st rank when in my 3rd class and literally I prayed for her to move out of the school then. Luckily her dad got transferred and she moved out :D later someone else took her place was a mystery! I was seeing every problem as a hurdle
- i realized life cant be interesting without this rat race that each one needs to go through! I could see the problems as the stepping stones!

I used to hate Mathematics. Hate to the extent that beginning of the academic year my tuition teacher used to ask me to bring my cousin's old books, cuz he was just one year elder to me, and that particular year I would be reading the same books as he did in his previous year. cousin's dad owned a sewing thread manufacturing unit which required a lot of paper, so I used to generously lend off his Maths book alone to them so that I can get rid of it once for all. But it never worked as I planned was a completely different story to write down!
- Some tsunami hit me in my sleep some day I guess, that I woke up to find Mathematics was my favorite subject and somewhere I was deeply connected to Einstein was how my college mates used to tease me.To add some more, when in college class rep used to call us once the semester results are out to sort out the toppers list.. and it was like default Rosh and myself used to join rest of the junta for that process. We start with instrumentation, electronic devices, electricals, machines .. blah blah and when the subject hits control systems (for those who dont have a hint bout the control systems paper, its heart flesh and blood is Mathematics), Rosh used to blindly shout my name out. For good, my controls score has never gone below 90s. Proud moments! :)

I was too serious a person who wanted to do every bit of the inhale/exhale process thinking only of life's principles, ethics, morals, values.. close to a saint's life.
- I got to know easier goes the mind, better for the heart. the deeper the curve, happier the life!

Following that, I used to think a lot, a real lot. Every thing that I do, I wanted to see a meaning, I carve out the right/wrong, good/bad, rational/irrational part of them
- I've become more of 'do what the heart says and do not think too much'! Live life king size! Bindaaazzzzz

I did not hesitate to go myself to someone when I knew that I can get done what I want
- I've stopped asking for help. 95% of the time.

I had the minimal patience to sort out any problem, I used to pray like crazy to get over the problems that I used to face, I get tensed so easily and even tougher was not showing it out.
- Now I can wait to resolve a problem at its own pace and can just think of anything that's bothering to be 'soooo what' ;) and can keep it out of my routines at least for that time-being!

'Making friends' was a thing that I could never imagine of! Not sure if I thought I did not need anybody
- It took no time for me to realize what an(y) individual would mean in one's life at any given point of time.

To start with, I was so much 'for' the male community (given that there is no boy baby at home), so much as in its like I would fall in love with every other boy I used to meet as a kid ;)
- Some day I realized it doesn't work this way anymore [;)] and wanted(ly) started going against them.
- But the process did not end completely there, I have got more logical that I grew up finding a perfect life partner :D

I was God-fearing. ya.. sometimes even superstitiously.
- I definitely am not superstitious now, happy that I could wash it out of my life completely. On the other hand, I don't know if I have lost the fear or I've got logical or analytical or rational. Don't want to think too much over it!

So far.. so good!

After all this, How can I not get the 'B' word.. Here it goes.. ... But....
'The One' thing that I cannot change in myself is the ghosts that I know of since childhood. You can't find me sleeping in my bedroom alone a single night (get it right) :P I have tried and experienced the scariest nights!